Monday, May 22, 2006

THE ONLY MAN-SCENTS ARE RESIDUAL

I really miss Chris Claremont... sometimes. Wolverine is taking Rogue along on her first mission with the X-Men and Paul Smith. He walks into the samurai/ninja/crimelord/arbitrator's office and thinks, "The only man-scents are residual."

You've got to hand it to Wolverine. He's been there. He's done that. He's so jaded (having been a soldier, a spy, possibly a farmer, a test subject, a super hero, an animal, a samurai, a criminal, a breeding ground for aliens, a murderer, a drunk, a mutant, a man and a Canadian) that he can just turn his ironymeter on and off like a lightswitch. He doesn't even crack a smile, but he knows better than to say something like that in front of Rogue. This "darlin's" new to being a hero, having only just left the spring-autumn clutches of lesbianism, and with a woman inside her still. She would probably snicker. In a southern accent. "Snickah." No wonder Ororo didn't like her.

However, since he's never been much of a businessman (I'm sure he's even said as much at some point), he can't even see the dollar signs before his hyper senses (a gift of the gene that made him a mutant, a step up the evolutionary ladder, a step that has made him and people like him feared and hated by ordinary humans) when he comes up with the incredibly marketable...


RESIDUAL MAN-SCENTS
Make sure they never forget you.

After perfume. For men. Or for anyone who wants to be remembered as one.

—————————————————————————

And I'm thinking that an all-Claremont Suave Prospects song NEEDS to be written. But what rhymes with "residual?" How about these:

"I'm the best there is at what I do, and what I do isn't pretty."

"She was kind t'me."

"I ken nae understan' what's wrong wi' her."

"Majestratix, I have failed you."

"The focussed totality of my powers."

"Were this but two weeks ago, I may have acted differently."

"I invited them to my wedding, but I may have lead them to their deaths."

—————————————————————————

And all this Claremonting reminds me of another Marvel writer from around the same time period: Peter David and the character he'll forever be associated with: The Incredible Hulk.

As I was going through the motions of setting up the tv for dvd viewing, Evelyn asked, "What are you going to do when you don't have suround sound?" A fair question, but it made me think about some of the items that will be contested between Marcos and I in the near future.

Only a few hours later, the grey Marcos was gamma-transformed into the green, rampagin' Marcos and he Hulk-smashed through the coffee table and wine glasses. Seemingly answering the unasked question. It's possible that he was under the Leader's mind control, but I still had to call in Thunderbolt Ross, Doc Samson and the Marcos-busters to capture him. Unfortunately, he leaped into sunset, lost to the Nevada desert.

8 Comments:

Blogger Marcos Perez said...

hah. apologies for the wine glass. the coffee table is yours.

i know which kitchen crap is mine.

the only contestable issue will be splitting up kenny's paintings.

oh an whether or not u want your tv back.

3:41 PM  
Blogger Justin J. Fox said...

I actually thought you'd want the table. The glasses aren't a big deal at all. I should buy them in bulks anyway.

You can have the paintings!
(just kidding, Kenny)
(no I'm not, Marcos)

And you can have the tv. One is enough.

I actually though there'd be more stuff... I guess not. You should have kept your futon though.

3:50 PM  
Blogger Marcos Perez said...

yeah, now that i think about it, but if i get a large studio i wont need it. if i get a 1br ill do it neil style. one chair.

i think i might begin looking for july. y wait? this way you can be rid of residual man scents.

4:25 PM  
Blogger Justin J. Fox said...

Whenever you're ready man. I should talk to Boris and let him know.

I've been planning this for a year now (I thought you were hinting about this last year) and have it all figured out.

You also have that other table, I just remembered.

4:33 PM  
Blogger Marcos Perez said...

june too soon. july, if something good comes up, though i suppose if i found something earlier, you wouldn't shit bricks about me not getting everything out in one day. we'll have to settle my security deposit.

jonso's dining table? or end table.
crappy endtable is coming wit me and that lamp. dining table is yours. doubt i'll need it.

4:41 PM  
Blogger Justin J. Fox said...

That big table between the couches. I think we mean the same thing. If you wanted the dining table, you could have it. I still don't really know what to do with it. Wait. Maybe I do.

4:50 PM  
Blogger Marcos Perez said...

you'll have lots of space. im sure you can find something to do with it.

4:53 PM  
Blogger Justin J. Fox said...

It's true. I'm gonna be Johnny flying elbows with space. And poverty.

5:58 PM  

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